LUCY'S HAIRDO: THE MODIFIED HAYAT! 
Tonight I write about adoption communities and the value of staying connected. I imagine many first-time adoptive parents get all excited about hooking into adoption communities, they read their pre-adoption homework and imagine how they will keep their kid connected with their culture. Some folks either by intention or accidental omission move on when their child comes home. Baby/kid comes home and suddenly you're more concerned with ear aches, school, day-care, getting more then 4 hours of sleep etc.
For me, being hooked into an adoption community (both online and in person) was really important while I was waiting, having someone as crazy (Sarah) as I was and in the same exact place in the wait was so so helpful (think shopping therapy and major gossip).
Years later I find myself still "addicted" to this online community. It is fun reading about other people's processes and hearing about the new policies, wait-times etc. It is also nice to be able to chime in with the voice of experience here and there.
I learn about hair care, skin care, writing life-books and general adoption politics. I celebrate with people and mourn with people ... many I've never met in person.
I have become "real-life" friends with people I've met on the forum or through my agencies waiting-families group. These groups have become one of my biggest support networks as well as a huge resource.
Relative to other international programs Ethiopia is still young. When I adopted in 2005 I had a 45 minute wait for referral and it was for an infant girl (even though I was open to gender). While I was completing my dossier for Ethiopia, the news of the Jolie adoption hit the papers. Ethiopian airline officials still didn't quite know how to handle the fact that I had an infant ticket but no infant (on the way to Ethiopia) and I was able to get an infant bassinet with little or no fighting.
There are still things that many of us folks who have adopted from Ethiopia are trying to come to terms with and figure out. There are social and political issues that we struggle with. There are medical issues that are relevant to hunger that our children face and that our pediatricians need to be educated about. Today I learned from another family about a health related issue that I am positive affected/affects my child.
It would be easy to go in a corner somewhere and deal with issues when they come up or when the become problematic. It would be easy to forget how special my family is, in the wonderful but tedious every day life it's easy to forget how our family was formed. I don't look at Lucy and think "adopted from Ethiopia" I look at her and see my daughter, no thinking needed.
I stay involved for myself and for Lucy.
